To be or not to be?

To be or not to be that is the question. The subject to be or not to be pregnant. I had my wonderful annual about 3 or 4 weeks ago. I was talking to her about my headaches I get with my wonderful monthly friend. I am beginning to think they are hormonal, obviously if that is when I get them. Well I told her I don't want to go on any kind of birth control, cause I know people have said that will help alleviate them. My reasoning is this. It took us 3 years to get pregnant with our daughter. We did all the testing to make sure there wasn't anything wrong. I had a very emotional time those three years especially the last one. I was stressed out a good year of that trying, when my brothers were in Iraq. And I started to not like my job. Well I got a new job and my brothers came home. Still nothing. That is when I began to think I was going crazy. I had 2 people that got pregant that I had major issues with. The one was not fit to be parents and I still think that way now. I just couldn't understand why we couldn't have the chance to be parents. I ask the Lord almost daily why can't we show you that we could be good parents and raise our child to know you and follow you. Then the days would come every month when I would cry for 24-48 hrs straight and get mad at the wrong person. Emotionally I couldn't take it anymore. My husband thought it was all his fault and he wouldn't talk about it. I need to talk about it. I went to a doctors appointment in tears and told them I thought I was turning into a nut case. They said no you are right were you are suppose to be. I thought that was a nut case answer. I finally watched a baby story that changed my way of thinking. The couple were both married before. The husband had been told in his first marriage that he wouldn't be able to have kids because his count was so low. So when he got remarried they were okay with the fact that they would probably never have kids. The story was for their second child. I don't know why that made me relax but it did. I think it was maybe a month month and a half later that we were pregnant.

So I told my dr that that is why I don't want to go on birth control. Because when Kaylee turns two I want to either be pregnant or start trying. She look at me and said I don't think you should wait until she is two. I think that you should start trying now and if your not pregnant by april you need to call us. So I don't know if I should activelly try or just wait and see. I am ready but I would also like to loose some weight before I get pregnant again. So I am running circles in my mind. To be pregnant or not to be, that is the question.

Holiday Home Tour

Holiday Home Tour!
Heidi Jo is hosting a Holiday Home Tour Extravaganza go here: http://heidijowhatdoyouknow.blogspot.com/ to see more Holiday Homes.

Here is a tour of our home. I actually am a late decorator this year. I had to get rid of a baby swing before I could decorate. I don't have alot of room in my home. So on with the tour.


This is one of the stockings hung by the window.



Every year since we have been together my husband buys me a Pr*ecious Moments X-mas bulb, they all have little stands with the year on it. I do have two different ones from the same year. I bought the extra one.



I actually keep these out all year long with my Pr*ecious Moments wedding figurines, this is one of the bulbs and my sister in law got me the other figurine in that year for x-mas.


This is my generic Pr*ecious Moments nativity set. It isn't real Pr*ecious Moments but it will do until someone in my family finally gets what I ask for x-mas. I have been asking for 4 years now for a real pr*ecious moments nativity set. Someday or I will have to do it myself.


The tree is decorated with gold bulbs and pr*ecious moments ornaments. Can you tell I like Pr*ecious Moments.


Every year(since I moved out on my own) for my birthday my mom gets me the pr*ecious moments ornament for that year. It obviously has the year on it. This is 2007's ornament.


This one says our first x-mas together. She gave that to me the first year me and mike were together.


2006's ornament


And I think this was 2001.


I have one for every year since 2000. And then I have plastic ones I have bought along the way. So that is my tour, thanks for touring my home.

You Belong in Fall

Intelligent, introspective, and quite expressive at times... You appreciate the changes in color, climate, and mood that fall brings Whether you're carving wacky pumpkins or taking long drives, autumn is a favorite time of year for you

What Season Are You?

Late but here she is!

I know it is kinda past, but here she is. This is my niece, Gretchen Louise, that was born on my 30th b-day. This is the day she was born. 9lbs even. She is a sweetheart!

No your eyes are not deceiving you, I actually posted a pic with me in it. This is Gretchen and me.

Here is a pic of Kaylee and a puppy my mom sold on Sunday.


We went and visited the new family on Sunday. So here is a new pic of the baby!

ICE In Case of Emergency

I got this in an email and thought that this warrented a post! It is a very good idea I hope that nobody ever has to use it but if they do I hope me passing it along helped. Thanks for emailing it to me Kari.


We all carry our mobile phones with names & numbers stored in its
memory but nobody, other than ourselves, knows which of these numbers
belong to our closest family or friends.


If we were to be involved in an accident or were taken ill, the people
attending us would have our mobile phone but wouldn't know who to call.
Yes, there are hundreds of numbers stored but which one is the contact
person in case of an emergency? Hence this 'ICE' (In Case of Emergency)
Campaign

The concept of 'ICE' is catching on quickly. It is a method of contact during
emergency situations. As cell phones are carried by the majority of the
population, all you need to do is store the number of a contact person or
persons who should be contacted during emergency under the name 'ICE'
( In Case Of Emergency).

The idea was thought up by a paramedic who found that when he went to
the scenes of accidents, there were always mobile phones with patients,
but they didn't know which number to call. He therefore thought that it
would be a good idea if there were a nationally recognized name for this
purpose. In an emergency situation, Emergency Service personnel and
hospital Staff would be able to quickly contact the right person by simply
dialing the number stored as 'ICE.'

For more than one contact name simply enter ICE1, ICE2 and ICE3 etc.
A great idea that will make a difference!

Let's spread the concept of ICE by storing an ICE number in our mobile
phones today.

Please forward this. It won't take too many 'forwards' before everybody
will know about this. It really could save your life, or put a loved one's
mind at rest .



ICE will speak for you when you are not able to speak for yourself.

Birthdays Birthdays and more Birthday's

Okay so you know that my mother in laws birthday was the 2nd. We went to spend the evening with her, when we got home there was a message on our answering machine. First I should tell you that we have been expecting 2 babys any day now. Our good friends were pregnant with there 3rd little boy. My brother and his girlfriend were pregnant with there 1st, unknown gender. I swore it was a boy. Okay so I knew that my brother and his girlfriend went into the hospital at 3am Friday morning. So back the the message. It was from Todd our good friend. They had there 3rd boy at 7:15 last nite. Awesome!!!! Well this morining my mom called at like 5 something, my brother is now the proud new daddy of a 9 pound baby.............can you guess.........is the suspense killing you.............was I right..............GIRL!!!!!!!!!! I about fell out of bed when I heard that. They had all boy clothes when I was at there house last. I was sure they knew and wasn't telling anyone. I am still in utter shock. I was so sure it was a boy. GIRL!!!!!!!!!

So now my husband shares his birthday with a friends little girl, my mother in law shares her birthday with our friends little boy, Kaylee my daughter shares her birthday with her uncle and now I share my birthday with my niece. COOOL!!!!

Halloween

I know I know 3 post on one day with minutes of each other. Sorry I had alot to share! So my mother-inlaws b-day is today and Yes you seen that right my 30th b-day is tomorrow. Yes I am not excited to turn 30. I will get over it though. I also might be sharing it with a new niece or nephew. If not born already and we just don't know. I know they are in the process. Anyways so here is our little pink poodle in the above pics. We hit maybe 5 houses is all. But that is okay. Now mommy wont' have temptation in the house! Hope everyone has a good weekend. Will post pics of party and new baby as soon as I get them.

Happy B-day Mommy!

Tomorrow is my mommy's b-day. I love my mommy sooooo much. She is going to be 30. Mommy will post pics after her surprise b-day party that got leaked and is not so much a surprise anymore.

Happy B-day MOMMY! I love you!!!!

Happy B-day GrammaM!

Today is GrammaM's b-day! I am gramma's girl as you can see! Happy B-day Gramma!

Love Kaylee

Pitures

Ignore the date on the pictures. It got changed on my camera. So it is not right.

? 9 months ago

So I think we all at work have figured out what everybody was doing 9 months ago. We had many of the pic below last nite at work. We were having a hard time keeping rooms open. For awhile we had no rooms. But that has been the last several months. Average month is 300 babies.






So now that I can barely keep my eyes open. I woke up Tues at 11 am and am now going to bed on Wed 7:30am... I always do that to myself though. I never sleep the first day that I work a nite shift. I work again tonite. Then off for a few days. If I start to make no sense at all ignore me!!!!!!! I am going to bed now. Have a good day.

The Mom Song

Did you know and update

So yesterday was my 2nd meeting. I was so not looking forward to it. I had a stressful week at work last week. We have been so busy. 200 and some babies is 20 some days can make a person busy. So needless to say I didn't eat quite right. Then this weekend we had a wedding. Which Kaylee got crabby at and was kinda stressing momma out. So needless to say I didn't pass on cake. Plus we were gone all weekend. Ate alot of fast food cause we weren't home. So last nite I was expecting to either stay the same or gain. The scale was so nice to me. I lost 4 pounds which is a good thing. Cause the last time I joined the 2nd meeting I gained. Which I think is the reason I quit so fast. I got extremely discouraged immediately. So this was a good start. I have been behaving the last few days. So that is my update. Hopefully next week is even better.

Below is an email I got today from my cousin. It makes me sick that she is making that much money. I would die just to get enough money to be debt free, buy 2 nice vehicles and a new house. That is all I want. Do you think she would give to a good charity (HaHa)!



Oprah Winfrey made $260,000,000 from June of 06 to June of 07. Yes, on a check that would be Two Hundred and Sixty Million Dollars. Here is a further breakdown of her 1 year earnings.

Oprah earned:
One Year = $260,000,000
Per Month = $21,666,667
Per Day = $712,328 (that's more than the NFL league minimum for an entire season)
Per Hour = $29,680 (that's roughly the average yearly income for an american individual)
Per Minute = $494.673 (roughly an average persons weekly wage)
Per Second = $8.24 (That's right. Everyt ime Oprah breathes in and then exhales,, she makes around $16.48 cents.)

My Issue

Everybody has issues in there life. Whether it be personal, finacial, emotional you get the idea. Well I don't know if those of you that have read my blog for awhile have ever noticed there is NO pictures of me. There is a reason. I don't want you to see me. Why? My issue is my weight. And first of all this is not an easy post for me. Let's just say I have been down about this subject for awhile. This is my way of trying to help myself do something about it. My thinking is maybe if I tell my blogger friends(which if you read this I hope I can say that)that I will get the support I so deperately need. What do I mean. Well first off, I LOVE my husband. But he does not understand my issue at all. WHen he was a senior in high school he was 160 lbs at 6 ft 4in. He was way to skinny. Now he is 220. He was sick for 2 days and lost 10lbs. He does not know what it is like to have to lose weight. In the spring/summer he looses weight. In the winter/fall he will put on weight. Not alot. After Kaylee was born he lost like 20 lbs. Not even trying mind you. Well I gained 13 lbs while I was pregnant with her. I have put on all my weight after she was born. I am not happy in my skin. I have bought maybe 2 articles of clothing in the last year for myself. I hate to go shopping for me. I try to stay away from a mirror at all cost. I do not go anywhere on my days off cause I don't want to be seen if I don't have to. My daughter is the only thing that has kept me from going into a deep depression because of it. I know this is turning into a not so good post. But I need to do this.

So today I have decided that I am so ready for a change. I need to find support. I need to explain to my husband how he HAS to help me help myself. Which I still don't know how to do that. I decided I am going to talk about the issue in my blog so I have to either read it, or talk about it to those of you that might comment on it. That way I will have the will to do something about it. So that those of you anticipating the news of how it is going I won't disappoint. My other step is to join Weight Watchers. I have been in the progam before. The very first time I lost 50 lbs. So I know it works. There is a meeting in the next town close to us.(about 8 miles away)

So I am going to make a promise to myself. But for all to see so that hopefully it will motivate me to be successful.
I promise to myelf to start my journey to lose the unhappiness from my life that is my weight problem. I want to be able to go to a store and buy clothes and not get mad and leave with nothing. I want to shed the pounds so that in a year I don't have to worry about how much more I will have to lose after the 2nd child. I want to be able to enjoy, my daughter and the next child, happily and not misirably. I want to be able to show my blogger friends pics of me and my family without feeling like a fool because of my weight. I want to look in the mirror and not be ashamed of what I look like. I want to be able to leave my house and not be ashamed of letting people see me. So today I am promising to MYSELF to start a journey to become healthy, happy and to become the person I can see in my mind who and what I want to look like.

So here is the start of a new journey. I want to thank those of you that want to come on that journey to see me through it now. It is going to be long and sometimes hard. But I know that if i find the right support I can do it right. So wish me luck and I guess stay tuned for a happier, healthier and hopefully smaller me in the months to come.

Awesome Website !

This is an awesome website. You can speak your mind and be descreet about it. That is a great thing. Everyone should check this website out.

People I dispise

These people take advantage of what most couples die to have!

Happy Birthday Bapa!

Today is my dad's birtday. He is the best dad I know. Even though growing up he might have be stern and rough around the edges. He is still a great father. Cause of that I learned to be who I am. I thank him for that. The first pic is the father/daughter dance on my wedding day, the other 2 pics are the day Kaylee was born and the weekend after she was born. They are my favorite pics. And I don't have any older pics on my computer.

HAPPY B-DAY BAPA!!!!!!!!!

Remember!

Bottles Part 2

So my reason for the bottles subject is this. When we were at the doctor for our 12 mos. check-up we talked about the bottle. First I want to tell you about a relative that has given us the will to get rid of the bottle as soon as we can. Our nephew turned 3 this last March. At Kaylee's 6mos check up the doctor told us to start transitioning her to a sippy cup. Which I guess I didn't find hard. Because her cousin (who was 3) was still sucking on a bottle. About a month ago we heard that he was supposedly off the bottle completely. Not true. A week before Kaylee's 1st b-day we found out he just got off the bottle. Kaylee has only been getting a bottle before bed since she was 6 mos old. So at our 12 mos check the doctor told me she wants the bottle gone by 15 mos.. Her doctor appt was the 31st of Aug. We are going on a week of absolutely no bottle. It has been a breeze of a transition. Don't get me wrong we still have a pacifier though. That I think is going to be a hard one to get rid of. We are trying to only use it for naps and bedtime though.

Bottles

I came across this today and couldn't believe there was such a thing. It is intresting to say the least. I personally think of laziness when I see it. What do you think?